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John's Blog

Give a man a fish and feed him for a day....Teach him to use the internet and he won't bother you for weeks!

Thursday, June 29, 2006

PhotoShoppers Face-Off

This, and many more updated WWII posters on display at Michelle Malkin is an Idiot as a rebuttal to a wingnut Photoshop competition.
|| JM, 10:35 AM || link || (2)||comments|| Email this link:

Digital Temptation

Sarah Silverman and her Sidekick
It's easy to see why Sarah loves her Sidekick. I didn't think these puppies had hit the street yet, but it looks like T-Mobile has them already. I was playing with one there yesterday, and I must say I was impressed. It's smaller, has a nice hand feel, and seems like it has a better build quality than the first two versions. Something else to add to my "tech lust" list.

A few more qualified hands-on reviewers from around the web seem to be similarly impressed.
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"One of the lessons of history is that nothing is often a good thing to do and always a clever thing to say."
Will Durant
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Quick Take

2001: A Space Odyssey in 2001 seconds (VIA digg)

If you've never seen the Stanley Kubrick classic 2001: A Space Odyssey, this re-edit might just get you up to speed. Some interesting musical choices giving it some more contemporary production values.
|| JM, 10:31 AM || link || (0)||comments|| Email this link:

Are You A Superhero?

Drink At Work: How To Tell If Your're A Superhero:
  • When a coworker asks where you went last night you accidentally blurt out “Jakarta.”
  • Your closest companion is someone 20 years your junior who has a diminutive version of your exact same name (i.e., “Boy Lou”).
  • You tend to get into fights with the same three people.
  • You have to remember to say “Ow” when shot.
  • For a supposed mid-tier executive at a biotech firm you seem to have spent an inordinate about of your teens and twenties in a monastery learning budo ninjutsu.
  • You’ve Googled “cowls.”
  • || JM, 10:29 AM || link || (0)||comments|| Email this link:

    Wednesday, June 28, 2006

    Rear Window

    Dust In The Wind-O (VIA linkfilter)
    Using the dusty back window of a Mini Cooper, Scott Wade re-creates classic American works of art such as "A Friend In Need", or as dolts such as myself know it as dogs playing poker. Wade uses the traditional paintbrush along with the less conventional popsicle stick and finger to craft his work. Todays' showing has been cancelled, due to rain.
    || JM, 12:13 AM || link || (1)||comments|| Email this link:

    Retro Video

    Separate Ways
    I remember when this video came out, and it seemed to me to be the point when Journey "jumped the shark". Back in the day when MTV still played music, this video encompassed most of the basic cliches of what was a new and emerging art-form. Even then, it seemed over the top silly. But looking back now at this mishmash of air guitar, slo-mo, quik-cut shots, the extreme 80's haircuts and fashions this one is sure to bring a smile to your face for one reason or another. Unlike the video, the song actually holds up better than I would have expected.

    But if it your ever had to choose the quintessential 80's video, it would probably come down to a choice between this one and Aha: Take On Me as the two finalists. I was tempted to consider the Paula Abdul & MC Skat Kat video of Opposites Attract until I realized that we were into the 90's by the time that one rolled out. And I'm probably slighting Lionel Richie, Phil Collins, Ray Parker, Huey Lewis, and several other pop icons by not including them in my short list. Oh well; my bad I guess.
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    "We succeed in enterprises which demand the positive qualities we possess, but we excel in those which can also make use of our defects."
    Alexis de Tocqueville
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    Best Mash-up...Ever!

    overplot (VIA Links)
    Combining the features of Google Maps with the classic content of Overheard in New York to give you endless interactive fun. Like walking the streets of New York, without the smell.
    || JM, 12:07 AM || link || (1)||comments|| Email this link:


    Anybody else see the shark in the water? My initial reaction to this weeks' episode of Entourage was that the addition of Dom to the crew was probably the worst addition to an ensemble cast since Cousin Oliver joined The Brady Bunch. Although hardly symptomatic of the "Cousin Oliver Syndrome" since that would require the addition of a cute and cuddly character, which Dom is definitely not, this is not a good development. I'm hoping that since we don't see him added to the shows' cast list that his story arc will be brief. I'd hope for painless as well, but I know that isn't possible since every moment of screen time he's been given has caused me pain.

    I've tried to watch this show twice, and both times I haven't been able to finish it. No, it's not because I can't watch it. It's because our own little "dominator" has decided that she this is the right moment for a doggie "relief" walk. She positions herself between me and the TV and just stares at me with those big eyes until I break down and take her out. I'll have to tape it so I can see the whole thing.
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    Tuesday, June 27, 2006

    End Of An Era

    Anyone who has driven the Garden State Parkway or who has seen The Sopranos is likely to be familiar with the giant Pabst bottle that towered over the brewery complex. But the 75 year reign came to an end on Monday when the
    Pabst bottle came down.

    The bottle, was originally built as a water tank for a company that made ginger ale. After Pabst acquired the site the bottle was painted blue and adorned with it's beer bottle label. The last few years it has been a lovely red color, probably rust, befitting the abandoned brewery complex. The complex is being demolished to make way for a shopping center, another sign of the times as we shift from a manufacturing economy to a service economy.

    Attempts to get landmark status for the bottle failed, and there are vague commitments that the bottle will be reassembled and will reappear elsewhere, but that remains to be seen. Let's hope for a creative rebirth.
    || JM, 9:03 AM || link || (5)||comments|| Email this link:

    Look, Up In The Sky!

    Probably one of the most enduring and iconic American heros has to be Superman. He's been reimaged numerous times, yet his essence remains the same, reflecting the classic values of truth, justice, etc. Even in this ill-fated kids show, The Adventures of SuperPup, they were on display although they were demonstrated by midgets wearing dog costumes!

    A few more little know facts from 40 Things You Didn't Know About Superman (VIA digg):
  • Superman couldn't originally fly.
  • Clint Eastwood was the original choice before they picked Chris Reeve.
  • Back in the day when Kevin Smith was developing a screenplay for a Tim Burton treatment, Jon Peters insisted that one of Superman's nemeses would be a gay robot and a giant mechanical spider. The spider showed up in Wild, Wild West instead. No word on what became of the gay robot.

  • And a few more links to get you up to super speed for tomorrows release of Superman Returns:
    Superman: The Continuity Pages
    Superman Homepage
    The Speeding Bullet: A Complete Archive of Superman Newspaper Strips
    Superman Through The Ages
    Superman in 30 Seconds Re-Enacted By Bunnies
    Superman is a Dick
    || JM, 12:16 AM || link || (2)||comments|| Email this link:

    The Department of Good Intentions

    Teen Sex Advice
    Dear God, please don't let this posting fall victim to the kind of search engine misdirection that will wind up pointing pedophiles to this. I'll have to take that risk I guess and hope that those looking for hot teen action won't be too disappointed.

    But when you pick a name for a group to advocate positive sexual health for teenagers, you might want to take a look at the acronym. The Sexual Health Action Group shortens up to SHAG....oops!

    They might be able to award one of these "merit badges" as recently submitted to a Worth 1000 Photoshop Contest. Plenty of other "funny" to be had there as well.
    || JM, 12:12 AM || link || (1)||comments|| Email this link:


    "Silence is the virtue of fools."
    Francis Bacon
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    Quick Quiz

    What Emoticon Best Represents You Right Now?

    Your Emoticon Is Laughing

    You've got a wicked sense of humor. You're everyone's favorite IM buddy... at least today!

    Yea, sure that's me. Just a barrel of laughs.
    || JM, 12:09 AM || link || (1)||comments|| Email this link:

    Monday, June 26, 2006

    Always Room?

    It seems like marketing hype that "there's always room for Jell-O" since I'm pretty sure I've made a pig of myself on more than a few occasions where there really wasn't any more room. A relic of simpler times and tastes, it still remains strong thanks to relentless marketing. Jell-o is actually the official snack food of the largely Mormon state of Utah where they have the highest per capita sales of Jell-o in the country. Why didn't we see this on the HBO soozefest "Big Love"? Then again maybe they did and I slept through that episode.

    When you break down the production process of Jell-o , it really sounds like some pretty nasty stuff. Take the skin and byproducts of various livestock and boil in a vat to extract the collagen protein. It's then dried and ground into a powder, then you mix in sugar, flavorings, color, and preservatives and you've got yourself the stuff that legendary bland deserts are made of. Is it any wonder that Jell-o shots were born? A few topical links:

    Jell-O Museum Web Site
    JELL-O History
    Everything you've ever wanted to know about making Jello* shots!
    Flaming JELL-O shots
    Suck & Blow (The next generation of jello shots, grab a partner and let the fun begin)
    Penis Jello Shots
    Common JELL-O shot mistakes
    The Art Of The Jello Shot
    Jello Shots Recipe
    Jello Biafra
    YouTube: Jello Wrestling
    || JM, 10:55 AM || link || (2)||comments|| Email this link:

    Fishy Stuff

    If you are serious about snack food, or just looking for some info-snacking Taquitos: The Crunchiest Site on the Web may offer up some tasty tidbits. These Squid Crackers made their "worst ever" list, but that's probably not a surprise. With the consistency of cheap styrofoam and an aroma like a three day old third world fish market, don't look for these in your local supermarket anytime soon.
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    "You must be the change you wish to see in the world."
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    Cover Me

    Jesus - "I Will Survive"
    At first I was afraid, I was petrified...
    But watching this video had me splitting my side...
    And like so many links that that you will come upon...
    Doesn't really matter that they are so very wrong...
    Alien Song: I Will Survive
    CAKE - I Will Survive
    ANIME: I Will Survive
    The Sims: I Will Survive!
    || JM, 10:48 AM || link || (0)||comments|| Email this link:

    Think Big

    Giant Computer Key Seat
    I could see this as a perfect fun "little" addition to any home office or dorm room. Great for extra seating or as a footstool for your inner geek. You can order this, as well as other oversized items from Customized messages are also available.
    || JM, 10:46 AM || link || (1)||comments|| Email this link:

    Friday, June 23, 2006

    Every Dog Has Its Day

    Take Your Dog To Work Day
    I knew it was only a matter of time till somebody came up with this idea. Luckily, I discovered it too late, and as a result the wife's co-workers probably had a more productive day. Besides, it would upset Chelsey's routine of napping on the couch, like in this recent shot.

    The event celebrates the positive influence that dogs make as loyal human companions. By demonstrating the joy provided by the bond that exists between pets and owners, it might provide the catalyst for your dog-less coworker to visit a shelter or rescue group and adopt one of their own.
    || JM, 11:14 AM || link || (2)||comments|| Email this link:

    Another Random Ten

    Great, the wife wants an iPod. The only problem is that she wants mine. Rather than going out and getting a new one for herself, she wants me to take the new one. This should be good news, but I find myself attached to this one and all the accessories I have for it that won't work with the new one, like the iTrip. But my reluctance to give this one up is probably based upon my inevitable profound disappointment when Apple brings out a new model right after I buy something.

    But in the interest of being trivial and frothy, from the current model comes another installment of the Random Ten:

  • Talk (Scrapped Version); Coldplay
  • Cheated Hearts; Yea Yeah Yeahs
  • One Evening; Feist
  • A Certain Romance; Arctic Monkeys
  • Only; Nine Inch Nails
  • Dani California; Red Hot Chili Peppers
  • Hate to Say I Told You So; The Hives
  • Lady; Lenny Kravitz
  • In Love; Ben Folds & William Shatner
  • Steady, As She Goes (Acoustic Version); The Raconteurs
  • || JM, 11:09 AM || link || (1)||comments|| Email this link:


    "Men will always be mad, and those who think they can cure them are the maddest of all."
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    The Other War

    The buzzwords are flying fast and furious; "stay the course", "cut & run", "phased withdrawal" seem to be peppered into what passes as political debate these days. Republican have adopted the questionable strategy of getting behind an unpopular war, with no apparent plan to move forward other than more of the same. Painting the opposition as weak, portraying any discussion and discourse on the subject as disloyal or enabling the enemy are all things that have worked pretty well in the past for the GOP, so why change now?

    Given the absence of any real ideas on how to fix this mess, the politics of fear seem to be on display once again. Democrats are almost enabling this, since there isn't a coherent message that is coming from the opposition, despite the fact that they have the majority of public opinion on their side. In these days of "talking points" and short attention spans, any real debate or exchange of ideas is something we aren't accustomed to seeing. Ironic since we claim to be bringing Democracy to the Middle East, yet it has been strangely absent 'round these parts.

    Let's hope that we can have some actual political discourse on this, and not the name calling that has been a major component of most discussions recently. The absence of a unified anti-war stance on the part of the Democrats isn't necessarily a sign of weakness...yet. If we allow the process to play out, hopefully a plan to extract US troops from Iraq can emerge. Leaders like Nancy Pelosi have provided glimpses of what an effective opposition can look like: "It's time to face the facts, This war is a failed policy of the Bush Administration.... We need a new direction in Iraq."
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    Thursday, June 22, 2006

    Last Monkey Standing

    Probably not the first occurrence of me linking to a story that included the words "george", "bush", "monkey", & "white house". But surprisingly we're NOT talking about Dubya this time. Joe Bush is the guy to call if you need an organ grinder with a monkey, since he's last organ grinder here in the NYC area.

    Thirty-one years ago, Joe got himself a monkey. Every night he would lock himself and George in the family room, tie himself to the monkey, and a battle of the wills would begin. Eventually, Joe won and they were a performing duo for the next fifteen years. Sadly, George passed on a few years ago, but is now freeze-dried and in Joe's study. His replacement, George II allowed the act to go on. But if you're thinking of hiring them, better have your ATM card handy, since an appearance will cost you between $600 and $5,000! But heck, they do costume changes and represent a rapidly disappearing art form. How can you go wrong?

    Today in a meeting that went on entirely too long, we were brainstorming about what special events and entertainment we could layer into an upcoming promotion. I only half kiddingly suggested Joe & George. Most people assume that much that comes out of my mouth comes from the part where my tongue is firmly planted in my cheek. But just about everyone seemed to think this wasn't one of my better ideas. Too bad; their loss. When there are no more organ grinders with monkeys to be found, don't come crying to me.
    || JM, 8:10 AM || link || (5)||comments|| Email this link:

    Job Interviews

    How NOT To Interview

    I apparently spent too much time today wearing my "HR" hat interviewing candidates for jobs, which probably explains why I got such a kick out of these video tidbits. A few more just to beat a dead horse:

    Job Interview With Boss
    Interview with nipple slip
    "Where do you see yourself in ten years?"
    KFC Interview
    Monty Python: Silly Job Interview
    The Office: Job Interview
    || JM, 8:08 AM || link || (2)||comments|| Email this link:


    "Better be alone than in bad company."
    Thomas Fuller
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    I know I've whined about this before, but the recent news about plans to move Madison Square Garden seems to be a bad idea born out of greed. In theory, this could be a "best of all possible worlds" convergence: preserving a historic structure with DNA ties to the original Penn Station, creating a rejuvenated public space and transportation hub, as well as a vibrant mixed-use commercial development. But when things sound too good to be true, they usually are.

    The original plan for Moynihan Station included a sweeping glass canopy creating a grand vaulted waiting area, reminiscent in scale to the original. The next revision ditched the canopy, but did keep a public space with a skylight; still an improvement over the current armpit of a station. But the new plan calls for a new Garden to be built within the Farley Post Office, primarily as a way for the developer to get some killer tax credits by moving MSG to a historic building, and then giving him the ability to develop the old space. Oh, and then we'll do some sort of rebuilding of Penn Station, details and financing to be determined. Freaking genius, except that one more time the public's best interests fall by the wayside. Seems like history repeats itself, at least as far as Penn Station is concerned. Let's hope Pataki, in a effort to insure a legacy of sorts, keeps the original proposal on track and New York gets a rebirth of a missing masterpiece and not another stab at mediocrity than ruins a historic structure.
    || JM, 8:04 AM || link || (1)||comments|| Email this link:

    Tuesday, June 20, 2006

    Sign Time

    Warning Sign Generator
    Another silly site; don't say you haven't been warned!
    || JM, 1:14 PM || link || (1)||comments|| Email this link:

    The Ramblings of a "Fun Guy"

    Nature Boy I'm not. Despite growing up in an area where I could see farms from my bedroom window, I somehow never got the urge to nurture my green thumb. Maybe it's a time management thing, maybe it's a backlash against my background, but watering the lawn is pretty much the extent of my contribution to the world of green things. Periodically, one of the neighbors takes great joy in pointing out locations where I could put in tomato plants. Yes, I could do that. I could also stand on my head, but I don't plan on doing either.

    So the other morning, I'm headed out the door to work, and I spot this giant yellow mass on top of the mulch in the planting bed. My first thought is that some wild animal had paid us a visit and either left us vomit or excrement as a calling card. That got scooped up and pitched into the trash. But the next day, it was back and in more locations with even more colorful variations. What kind of a creature with what kind of horrible gastrointestinal infliction could be responsible?

    Ah, finally an opportunity to harness the awesome legitimate power of the internet, as more than a time-waster or as a gateway to pr0n. A few clicks later I found out that I was the proud owner of Fuligo Septica. No, not a character from The Soprano's, but a fungus sometimes referred to as the "dog vomit slime mold". And the REALLY good news is that "there is nothing you can do about it". Making matters even worse is that the link to corn smut was NOT at all what I had in mind! Truly disturbing is the news that scientists have been able to use this fungi as the brains of a six-legged robot! Run for your lives! Definitely NOT one of the robots you are going to have sex with.
    || JM, 1:12 PM || link || (4)||comments|| Email this link:


    Who Killed The Electric Car?
    Who Killed the Electric Car? Part 2
    The soon to be released documentary "Who Killed the Electric Car?" deals with the shameful and untimely death of an environmentally friendly concept. Victim of bad marketing, consumer resistance, and a lack of commitment and support from both the manufacturer and the government (and of course big oil), we never saw the electric car get a real chance to catch on. And since you could never buy them (GM only leased them in California) when they "pulled the plug" on them, they are now gone.

    Maybe someday, we will see serious commitment to environmental issues by our government. And while I'm dreaming perhaps responsible corporate stewardship on behalf of the public interest could be added to my wishlist. We're just as likely to see that anytime soon as we are to see a functional version of The Jetson's Car.
    || JM, 1:11 PM || link || (2)||comments|| Email this link:


    "The future ain't what it used to be."
    Yogi Berra
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    All Mixed Up

    Inside KitchenAid (VIA Netscape)
    If you have a thing for mixers, then a visit to the KitchenAid Experience might be something you want to add to your vacation itinerary. I'm just gonna' stick with this virtual tour for now.
    || JM, 1:05 PM || link || (0)||comments|| Email this link:

    Monday, June 19, 2006

    Separated At Birth?

    OK, what the heck happened to Christopher Walker? When I saw this recent picture I couldn't escape this "separated at birth" comparison. Not one of the most on target S-A-B's , but I just couldn't let this the moment pass without sharing it.

    For some much better ones, you could check out the recent Fark Photoshop: Seperated at Birth thread.
    || JM, 10:33 AM || link || (2)||comments|| Email this link:

    Fake It

    I can't think of a legitimate use of this Fake Name Generator (VIA Populicious) unless you need fake data to populate a database. Personally, I prefer using names along the lines of Holden McGroin.
    || JM, 10:32 AM || link || (1)||comments|| Email this link:


    "Get all the fools on your side and you can be elected to anything."
    Frank Dane
    (something Rove has known all along)
    || JM, 10:30 AM || link || (0)||comments|| Email this link:

    Good Dog Stuff

    I would have to agree that the website "Fun Stuff For Dogs" has some of the Funniest Dog Stuff Ever! I can't decide if I should order the doormat or the "Cat...The OTHER white meat" collar tag. Plenty of other good choices for the dog owner looking for something fun and unique.
    || JM, 10:28 AM || link || (2)||comments|| Email this link:

    Facts...maybe, Useless...yes!

    I can't be sure that these Useless Facts have ANY legitimacy, but in any event they provide some time wasting amusement:
  • By the time they are 65 years old, most Americans have watched more than nine years worth of television.
  • Rubber bands last longer when refrigerated.
  • Two-thirds of the world's eggplant is grown in New Jersey.
  • "Stewardesses" is the longest word that is typed with only the left hand.
  • Lip stick contains fish scales.
  • Chickens can't swallow while they are upside down.
  • 4000 people are injured by teapots each year.
  • If you fart consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb.
  • (But I'm guessing that you would have very few friends.)
    || JM, 10:26 AM || link || (0)||comments|| Email this link:

    Friday, June 16, 2006

    Happy, Happy, Happy

    Most people recognize Billy West as the voice of Stimpy (Ren and Stimpy), and Fry (and others on Futurama) but aren't aware that he has also been the red M&M, the Honey Nut Cheerios Bee, as well as Bugs Bunny. For most of us, Billy caught our attention as a member of The Howard Stern show back when it was at it's creative peak. The show was never as funny after he left. Coincidence? I think not.

    TV Squad just did a great, wide-ranging interview with Billy that fans should enjoy. I found it funny that one of his favorite shows that he watched growing up was The Man from U.N.C.L.E. That's probably all we have in common, since the only funny voice I do is when I stub my toe against something which, come to think of it isn't that funny unless you find cursing comical.

    Hopefully, we'll be seeing Billy Bastard: Amateur Human Being sometime soon. Also coming soon (on June 28th), a new season of the excellent TV series Hustle featuring The Man from U.N.C.L.E.s' Robert Vaughn playing one of a team of con artists who target those who deserve to loose their money. Originally made for the BBC it's one of the most stylish and entertaining shows on television and it deserves a look if it's not already one of your favorites.
    || JM, 12:18 AM || link || (3)||comments|| Email this link:

    Look West Young Man!

    From one West to another. This clip is a pilot for a show staring Adam West, where he plays a washed up actor who gets typecast thanks to a role he played. What made this different from real life is that the actor has a tough time separating himself from his persona, and he thinks he's a REAL crime fighting detective. A great self-depreciating performance from the man who owned the Batman identity. A product of the creative minds of Conan O'Brien & Robert Smigel, it's too bad this one never got picked up as a series. But thanks to Brilliant But Cancelled gems like this can get the recognition they should have received.
    || JM, 12:17 AM || link || (0)||comments|| Email this link:


    "Good judgement comes from experience. Experience often comes from bad judgement."
    Rita Brown
    || JM, 12:16 AM || link || (1)||comments|| Email this link:

    Another Random 10

    iPod Dock + Toilet Paper Holder (VIA Land-O-Links)
    My first instinct was that this device looked pretty silly. But when you think about it, this could be a great idea if the execution is right. My concern is that it would have...crappy speakers...(rim shot).

    But for now, another spin of the party shuffle to see which are the first ten songs that pop up on the ol' iPod:

  • Skin It Back; Little Feat
  • Nobody's Fool; Vinyl
  • Wild Wild Life; Talking Heads
  • Trouble; Coldplay
  • Comfortably Numb; Dar Williams
  • Jesus Came From Outer Space; Supergrass
  • Here Comes The Supernatural Anaesthetist; Genesis
  • Chump; Green Day
  • Plush (Acoustic); Stone Temple Pilots
  • Humility On The Parade; Harvey Danger
  • || JM, 12:14 AM || link || (1)||comments|| Email this link:

    Graphic Evidence

    Websites as Graphs (VIA aka_monty)
    Because a picture is worth a thousand words, I'll take the easy way out yet again. This site features a java applet that creates a visual representation of what ever website you choose. And a Flickr Gallery of other's results filled with clustery goodness!
    || JM, 12:12 AM || link || (1)||comments|| Email this link:

    Thursday, June 15, 2006

    Go Fly A Kite

    Today marks the anniversary of the famous kite flying experiment where Ben demonstrated that lightning is a stream of electrified air. It looks like mother nature is cooperating by providing a thunderstorm today in the event that I wanted to stage a re-enactment. I think I'll pass on that and just peruse a few links on this influential scholar, statesman, and apparently a merchant too.

    Ben Franklin: In Search of a Better World
    Guide to Benjamin Franklin
    Benjamin Franklin FAQ
    A Documentary History
    || JM, 11:33 AM || link || (1)||comments|| Email this link:


    "Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, half shut afterwards."
    Ben Franklin
    || JM, 11:32 AM || link || (0)||comments|| Email this link:

    I'm All Outta Gum

    The recent announcement that "We won't rush Duke Nukem Forever" seems to be stating the obvious. Promising to update everyones' favorite hero with contemporary 3D graphics has been a promise that we've been hearing since 1997. It's hard to imagine that this is something that we are ever going to see; to consider it anything more than vaporware at this point really stretches the imagination. Yet, much like the child who is old enough to know that Santa doesn't exist, we can all still hope.
    || JM, 11:31 AM || link || (0)||comments|| Email this link:

    Bid Now!

    Outrageous Ebay Auctions: Ben Roethlisberger Replica Motorcycle Helmet

    You'll find the wackiest stuff on eBay sometimes: "This is an exact replica of the helmet that Ben Roethlisberger was wearing when he crashed his motorcycle on June 12, 2006."
    || JM, 11:29 AM || link || (0)||comments|| Email this link:


    The Joy of Tech: Dogs on IRC
    I'm not sure if I like this one because of the dogs, or from spending too much time on IRC. Either way, some funny stuff via Geek Culture.
    || JM, 11:28 AM || link || (0)||comments|| Email this link:

    Wednesday, June 14, 2006

    Yet Another Mini Rant

  • OK, anybody other than me get confused when they saw the news that the youngest Hanson brother got married recently? All I could think of were THESE guys, from the old movie Slap Shot. This news is guaranteed to make you feel old, no matter which way you spin it.
  • And yet another buzzkill is the commercial that I keep seeing for a mini-van featuring The Who's "Magic Bus". This is sad on so many levels I just can't stand it. Whether it's the mainstreaming of a song that was once "cool" (insuring that I date myself one more time), or the idea that if you buy this you'll be "hip" it's a questionable campaign. Bottom're still driving a freakin' mini-van. And given Pete Townshend's alleged kiddie porn problems do you really want this association with a vehicle that's used to haul around children? Sure, pile 'em in the back and take 'em on a trip to The Neverland Ranch Daycare Center.
  • Perhaps I've spent too much time reading the ads on Craigslist (for entertainment purposes ONLY). When I see that T.S. Alberto is headed for Florida all I can think of is a tranny going there for a visit..
  • Just the other day I was ranting about places that use silly names that make ordering food frustrating or humiliating. Looks like Wendy's picked up on that vibe; Bye Bye Biggie!
  • Enough with the viral marketing. The first twenty times it might have been amusing or effective. But it's so overdone now that as soon as I get a whiff of what's going on I'm outa' there. And is this image from a Bacardi site supposed to entice me? I know there is a long and time tested tradition of using boobs to sell cars and alcohol, but this is a bit much!
  • || JM, 9:03 AM || link || (1)||comments|| Email this link:

    Rock You Like A Hurricane

    Animated Hurricane Simulation (VIA digg)
    An illustrated version of The Saffir-Simpson Scale, which measures average wind speed and ranks hurricane intensity into five categories. Probably not news to anybody living in costal areas or from Florida, where this is a harsh reality. But for the rest of us, who are blissfully ignorant, some good information.
    || JM, 9:01 AM || link || (1)||comments|| Email this link:


    "You never know what is enough unless you know what is more than enough."
    William Blake
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    When Worlds Collide

    Star Trek vs. Star Wars (VIA Wired: Table of Malcontents)
    Subject of debate on newsgroups for years, a video mashup of what would happen if the Enterprise encountered the Death Star.
    || JM, 8:51 AM || link || (0)||comments|| Email this link:

    History Lesson

    CRACKED: President Bush Learns 5 Important Lessons from History
    Dubya revisits his 4th grade history book, and thanks to the benefits of age and wisdom this time he was able to comprehend more than half of it! Join him as he explains the lessons that history can teach us about today's world.
    || JM, 8:47 AM || link || (0)||comments|| Email this link:

    Tuesday, June 13, 2006

    Where Some Guy HAS Gone Before

    The internet. A powerful tool that allows us to boost productivity, that brings people together to communicate, perform research on far reaching topics without leaving your easy chair, and many other worthy uses. On the other hand you have the less highbrow uses. Places like YTMND have become hugely popular by being repositories of silly humor and creativity. That's probably just as important as the so called "legitimate" uses. Then again, I'm just a ten year old at heart who is easily amused.

    One of the recurring topics or fads that get posted there are the Star Trek themed entries. (Not all of these seem to work in Firefox, so if you aren't getting the sound, try Safari or IE to get the full effect.) A few of the better ones that are worth checking out:
    Data is NOT having a wonderful time!
    Can't Break Scotty's Stride
    Dr. McCoy is amazing
    Picard's Song
    Riker has NO CLASS
    Worf isn't Smart
    Geordi Escapes YTMND Fad Status!
    Picard Teaches Art Class
    Khan finds Waldo
    Picard Computer Problem
    A Night at the Hothberry
    What's Up Spock?
    Captain Kirk Song
    || JM, 1:12 AM || link || (5)||comments|| Email this link:

    Dubya's Energy Policy

    Global Warming
    Yes, us liberals and godless tax raisers keep using those inconvenient facts and scientific data. What frightens me is that this parody probably isn't too far removed from the real deal. A few more informative links on a topic that we need to start taking more seriously:
    How Melting Glaciers Alter Earth's Surface, Spur Quakes, Volcanoes
    Global warming article on Wikipedia
    Climate Change FAQ
    Global Warming: Human Fingerprints
    || JM, 12:44 AM || link || (2)||comments|| Email this link:


    "She believed in nothing; only her skepticism kept her from being an atheist."
    Jean-Paul Sartre
    || JM, 12:43 AM || link || (0)||comments|| Email this link:

    Bad Widgets

    The Porn Hole
    I've had the urge to add some new widgets recently. This one has potential, but I'm just not sure how I'd explain The Porn Hole to the wife. Since it takes your preferences and filters the pr0n to a port hole looking widget on the desk top, the days of wasting time looking for filth may just be over. My best bet is to sell it as a productivity boosting tool. Yea, that'll work I'm sure.
    || JM, 12:41 AM || link || (0)||comments|| Email this link:

    Home Improvement

    For some reason, I love watching those home improvement shows. Perhaps, it's because they allow me to entertain the fantasy that someday I'll tackle one of those projects. I've always thought that if I watch these enough, knowledge and perhaps motivation just might rub off on me.

    Then again, it could be because of the hosts. I really think that HGTV stands for "hot girl TV", since the formula that most of these shows have usually entails the hot babe, plus her team of worker bees, and one of them is always going to be a metrosexual male. The format works for me, since I keep tuning in.

    However, none of these shows have showcased anything as appealing as these Puzzle Floor Tiles (VIA Idiot World) that allow you to put down a new hardwood floor as easily as putting together a jigsaw puzzle! Looks like fun, and I could actually see this in my sunroom, although I suspect it would be almost as tough a sell as the porn hole.
    || JM, 12:38 AM || link || (0)||comments|| Email this link:

    Sunday, June 11, 2006

    Ale, Ale, The Gangs' Got Beer

    A recent survey ask college students "If you had the choice between an iPod and a beer, which would you choose?" Surprisingly to me at least, 73% of those interviewed picked the iPod. But for those in the minority (or those who already HAD an iPod perhaps) here are a few hopped-up links:
    20 Cheap Beers Reviewed
    Cheap Beer Server
    Free Beer!
    U.S. Beer Drinking Team
    Beer In The Butt
    We were born nude. We love our beer. After a few, we rip off our gear
    Irish Toasts for Everyday and Special Occasions
    History Of Beer
    If Operating Systems Were Beers ...
    Budweiser: Uncyclopedia
    This Budvar's For You
    || JM, 9:30 AM || link || (2)||comments|| Email this link:

    Real Men of Genius

    Mr. Silent Killer Gas Passer

    There was a time when heros went "unsung". Not anymore. These are their stories:
    Mr. Professional Figure Skater
    Mr. Foot Long Hotdog Inventor
    Mr. Rest-room Toilet-paper Refiller
    Mr. Really Really Really Bad Dancer

    The complete Wikipedia list of ALL the Real Men of Genius commercials.
    || JM, 9:29 AM || link || (2)||comments|| Email this link:

    Beer Quotes-A-'Da-Day:

    "A fine beer may be judged with only one sip, but it's better to be thoroughly sure."
    Czech Proverb

    "Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut."
    Ernest Hemingway

    "You can't have a Real Country unless you have a BEER and an airline - it helps if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a BEER."
    Frank Zappa

    "Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world."
    Kaiser Welhelm

    "I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy."
    Tom Waits

    "I drink with impunity...or anyone else who invites me."
    W.C. Fields
    || JM, 9:28 AM || link || (0)||comments|| Email this link:

    Shaken, Not Stirred

    For a nonalcoholic treat, perhaps a tall glass of Bubble Tea might be the refreshment you seek. This classic Asian beverage originated in Taiwan and appears to be gaining in popularity. You can make your own, but it's probably easier to find a place close to you where this frothy treat is served. Tapioca pearls are cooked and steeped in boiling water, then cooled and covered in syrup. They then get the other ingredients (tea, fruit, milk, and other flavoring) added in, the concoction gets stirred up and served with a big-assed straw to allow you to suck up the chewy tapioca "bubbles" that reside on the bottom of the glass. This beverage is also known as "boba" which is used to describe it because it has the same texture as female breasts. That's a guarantee to get MY attention. But if YOU need to know more:
    History of Bubble Tea
    The Tale of 'The Bubble Tea Origin'
    Bubble Tea: fun, colourful, tasty and even chewy!
    Bubble Tea: FAQ
    || JM, 9:26 AM || link || (0)||comments|| Email this link:

    Black In Back

    Renova Black (VIA linkfilter)
    The next big's new, it's chic, and it's black. Proving that black is the new black I suppose. I'm not sure which is more disturbing from a practical point of view: this black stuff or the red version that the company sells. For now you have to be in Europe to get that. I'll stick to the boring and pedestrian white myself.

    Should I be worried that for the 2nd time in about a week, I'm doing a posting on toilet paper? Perhaps. But it just seems to be a continuation of the trend of me doing some really crappy posts.

    Not so crappy, but also black would be Lewis Black. If you're a fan and didn't get to catch his recent HBO Special: Red, white & screwed here's a taste from his recent Conan appearance via onegoodmove. After the special I'll never look at the Old Testament the same way ever again.

    And in a lame attempt to tie this together with the rest of today's posts, perhaps a trip to the urinals of the Budweiser Budvar Brewery might do the trick. Oh no...another urinal reference.
    || JM, 9:24 AM || link || (0)||comments|| Email this link:

    Friday, June 09, 2006

    Retro Links

    Still craving the taste of Roy Rogers (the fast food, NOT the cowboy!) leads me to peruse a few of my nostalgia bookmarks. A lame-o link-dump was sure to follow:

    Swinging Chicks of the 60's
    Fast Food Premiums
    Retro Toys
    Widen Your World: Deceased Disney
    Abandoned & Little-Known Airfields
    Abandoned Pennsylvania Turnpike
    Roadside Architecture
    Bob's Big Boy
    Everybody Goes To Gino's
    Origin Of Potato Chips
    The Dick Van Dyke Show: Gentiles in Paradise
    || JM, 12:52 PM || link || (1)||comments|| Email this link:

    Enough Is Enough

    Google Earth: Gone Too Far?

    A much better use of the Google Maps API would be this interactive Strip Club Map allowing you to plan a trip to an adult entertainment location with ease.

    And I thought the Star Trek Cribs video was cute, until I realized that it was a promo for G4TV. I still refuse to watch this channel, since I never forgave them for killing off (or at least dumbing down) TechTV. Despite attempts to fill the gap it's just not the same.
    || JM, 12:51 PM || link || (1)||comments|| Email this link:


    "If you are a dog and your owner suggests that you wear a sweater suggest that he wear a tail."
    Fran Lebowitz
    || JM, 12:35 PM || link || (1)||comments|| Email this link:

    Quiz Time

    Art Or Fake? (VIA linkfilter)
    A little quiz to see if you can spot the difference between real works of abstract modern art from random junk. Not as obvious as I had thought, since I only got 83%. Still, a passing grade.
    || JM, 12:33 PM || link || (2)||comments|| Email this link:

    And, In Other News...

    Tom Tomorrow: Haditha Rorschach test

    And a Letter to Ann Coulter from Henry Rollins (nsfw).
    || JM, 12:26 PM || link || (0)||comments|| Email this link:

    Thursday, June 08, 2006

    Road Trip

    I just got back from a little road trip, so I haven't had much time to surf and I really don't have fresh links to share. So, instead I'll just rant and ramble.
  • You know when you start seeing bullet points, that you're gonna' see many small and unrelated ideas without any intellectual "mortar" to hold them together. This is no exception.
  • In viewing my site stats, I noticed that someone had done a search for "affair with my boss" along with the name of where I work (which I've carefully NOT mentioned in THAT context, for legal reasons, although I've left plenty of bread-crumbs scattered about). That set off a wave of paranoia (for no reason) and caused me to go back and see why a Google search would have pointed there. After reading the entry, the referral made sense, since all the words were there in a different context. But it also reminded me that my recent postings have been of dubious quality, compared to some of the old stuff. This entry ain't changing that trend.
  • But it's not only me that's been sucky; Blogger has been way too funky for my taste the past few days. But you get what you pay for.
  • I stopped at a Starbucks on the turnpike to grab some java. I got over their snooty "Tall/Grande/Venti" sizing system long ago, and just went with the program. But a busload of tourists arrived the same time I did, and an older gentleman who obviously wasn't in their demographic was there ordering a "small". They refused to give it to him until he ordered a "tall".'re a barista at a reststop; just give the old guy his coffee and move on.
  • It's just that reason that prevents me from ordering the "rooty tooty fresh 'n fruity" breakfast at IHOP. I just hope that the wife orders it and then it becomes a simple "what she's having".
  • Tapping into the Starbucks backlash I see that several chains are marketing to the average Joe, although once again that damn BK King just scares the living crap out of me. But this doesn't seem to be stopping the trend of Starbucks popping up EVERWHERE, and there's one dude who is determined to visit every one of them!
  • The damn PA Turnpike has been under construction most of my adult life. Maybe this time they will get it right. Some great history (AND bad html) can be found here.
  • Even though I wasn't the least bit hungry, driving past one of the few remaining Roy Rogers Restaurants on the turnpike was tough to do. The temptation to grab a bacon-cheeseburger was almost too much to resist. But the memories are probably better than the reality.
  • I love the convenience of the iPod during long drives. So much easier than fumbling with tapes or CDs. But I picked a playlist that had some great old songs that I hadn't heard for a long time. I know that I've misheard the lyrics to the Springsteen classic "Rosalita" for so long that although I know the words are actually "Sloppy Sue and Big Bone Billy, they'll be coming up for air" I keep hearing "Sloppy Sue and Big Balls Billy". Some things you just can't change, no matter how hard you try.
  • || JM, 10:53 PM || link || (1)||comments|| Email this link:


    "The fool wonders, the wise man asks."
    Benjamin Disraeli
    || JM, 10:52 PM || link || (0)||comments|| Email this link:

    Is This Necessary?

    This website promises to help you Overcome The Effects Of Circumcision. Seems like a case of locking the barn door after the horse is gone to me. If you use the product, they promise "a feeling of warmth, security and self-esteem". Oh yeah, my self-esteem will freakin' skyrocket with one of those pieces of plastic attached to my junk, I'm sure.

    And on a loosely related topic, I had the TV on the other day and in the disclaimer/warning section of one of those new drugs they were advertising, they said "if you are prone to heart failure, mention this to your physician". Well thanks for reminding me; like I wouldn't have mentioned that otherwise?
    || JM, 10:49 PM || link || (1)||comments|| Email this link:

    Must Love Jaws!

    A Heartwarming Family Film
    || JM, 10:45 PM || link || (0)||comments|| Email this link:

    Wednesday, June 07, 2006


    I've always been a Star Trek fan, but have felt that dressing up might be a step too far unless there was a french maid or a catholic school girl outfit involved. This Klingon Picture Gallery doesn't do much to change my mind. But if you do feel the need, you should be able to handle the basics of Klingon Cursing. (And from the recycling department some previous Klingon postings.)
    || JM, 12:19 AM || link || (1)||comments|| Email this link:

    Ain't Science Grand?

    Lunch Makes Us Sleepy (VIA Attu Sees All)
    Most everybody I know thinks I fall asleep during those afternoon meetings simply because I'm bored. But thanks to the action of glucose blocking the neurons that make orexins, the protein that would allow me to stay awake, my eyelids usually get very heavy about twenty minutes into the meeting. Now, I've got an excuse for those little power naps. Next I've got to find out the scientific explanation of why I didn't hear what the wife just said. Probably testosterone related.
    || JM, 12:17 AM || link || (1)||comments|| Email this link:


    "It seemed the world was divided into good and bad people. The good ones slept better... while the bad ones seemed to enjoy the waking hours much more."
    Woody Allen
    || JM, 12:16 AM || link || (1)||comments|| Email this link:

    Dubya Dubya Dubya Dot Sumthin...

    The Genius of George Bush

    And the hits just keep on coming, as Dubya and Condi discuss Hu's On First: The Next Generation.

    Then again, you could pay a visit to George Bush: Jedi.
    || JM, 12:15 AM || link || (0)||comments|| Email this link:

    Mini Rant

    A few things that bugged me today:
  • Tip jars at the counter. Doesn't matter if it's where I'm getting coffee or if it's take-out, there's always one there. Don't get me wrong, I don't mind tipping when there has been good service provided but don't give me that entitlement crap for doing your job.
  • So I'm running today and some douche bag drives by in a Bentley convertible with the top down. That alone didn't bother me, but as he drove past he felt the need to let go of the wheel and thrust both hands in the air like he was on a roller coaster. I was tempted to grab my cell and call the police, since that's gotta be against some law. Dude, the steering wheel is there for a reason...use it!
  • Another case of "I shoulda' used the little boys room" before I went on my run. Luckily, there is a spot that is pretty secluded, except for it's exposure to the Northeast Corridor Amtrack line that runs through the park. Why, oh why everytime when I find myself in this predicament, and I'm mid deed is there always a train that magically appears?
  • And one more special moment during todays' run, when the school crossing guard felt she needed to get out of her lawnchair and escort me across the highway. Last time I checked I was an adult and didn't need this kind of help. Making it worse is that she yelled at me that I didn't move when she told me to go; making sure that I turned into a virtual 10yr. old. Perhaps, I need to find a different way to go that doesn't include crossing guards...or one that has a "hot" crossing guard at least!
  • || JM, 12:13 AM || link || (1)||comments|| Email this link:

    Tuesday, June 06, 2006

    You're In For A Treat

    Nature's Call (VIA The Crazy Rants of Samantha Burns)
    These beautiful hand crafted one-of-a-kind urinals are on display in San Francisco until June 13th. The inspired vision of artist Clark Sorensen produced a variety of pieces inspired by flowers or other natural phenomena. My personal favorite is this nautilus shell; a perfect example of form meets function. And as stunning as they are, these babies were designed to be fully functional units...just don't try them out while they are in the gallery exhibition.
    || JM, 11:30 AM || link || (1)||comments|| Email this link:

    Here Comes The Pun

    It's bad enough that Heather Mills/Paul McCartney divorce is plastered all over the tabloids. But from the "how could this get any worse" department comes the discovery of old German porn that she had done long ago. Adding insult to injury would be the captions as added by the UK tabloid The Sun:

  • Abbey Rude
  • Strawberry feels forever
  • I wanna cuff your hands
  • Oil you need is love
  • || JM, 11:27 AM || link || (0)||comments|| Email this link:


    "Better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt."
    Abraham Lincoln
    || JM, 11:27 AM || link || (0)||comments|| Email this link:

    Only Ten?

    10 Reasons to Impeach George W. Bush (VIA linkfilter)
    As prospects grow for a Democratic takeover of the House of Representatives, and perhaps even the Senate, this November, the idea of impeachment is gaining attention. Yet even as polls show increasing numbers of Americans supporting the idea of removing Bush from office before the end of his term, Democratic Party leaders keep backing away...

    No one should imagine that a successful impeachment of President Bush would usher in some wonderful new world of honest and progressive government. The Democratic Party long ago lost its soul and its right to call itself a party of the people. But if the American people, in the course of this 2006 election year, force the Democratic Party to do that which their leaders are afraid to do--to impeach this criminal president--there is a chance that those same people will also push the Democratic Party to do other things that it has not done in decades: namely to act in the interests of ordinary working people instead of the same moneyed interests that own the party of Lincoln.
    || JM, 11:24 AM || link || (0)||comments|| Email this link:

    Slick Stick Pics

    Animator vs. Animation (VIA
    A cute little flash piece where the animated character turns the tables.
    || JM, 11:22 AM || link || (0)||comments|| Email this link: