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John's Blog

Give a man a fish and feed him for a day....Teach him to use the internet and he won't bother you for weeks!

Tuesday, August 31, 2004

One To Beam Up

Farewell, Mister Scott

A touching tribute to Star Trek's James "Scotty" Doohan from Wil "Wesley" Wheaton.. Probably one of the better things to come out of one of those ST conventions.

Fans Hope Suns Can Rise Again on 'Star Trek'

Another article on Scotty's final bow. Warning; link contains pictures of those scary Trekies that dress up as Klingons, as well as a guy who looks like the "comic book guy" from The Simpsons. Also addresses the sorry state of the Star Trek franchise. I've not been too critical up to this point, even though I thought Nemesis sucked, I was willing to give Enterpise room to grow and to grow on me. I actually enjoyed this season's story arc.....right up until the "dramatic conclusion"......SPACE NAZI'S??.....give me a break! I guess they have to recycle old sets and the uniforms from Voyager given this season's budget cuts. Maybe they can write their way out of this, but we'll have to see.

I do sorta' like to see the stunt casting for the opening episode of Enterprise that features some familiar faces from The Soprano's (Joe Maruzzo ("Joe Peeps") as "Sal," and Steven R. Schirripa ("Bobby 'Bacala' Baccalieri") as "Carmine." ), although I find it potentially confusing to have Bobby Bacala and Scott Bakula together; distant relatives, perhaps? Another nice touch is the tip of the hat to TOC "The City on the Edge of Forever" which I had thought might be involved in this story arc. Let's hope that they can make the Shatner guest slot happen this season.

Looking forward to getting the newly released Trekkies 2 DVD soon, as well. And since I'm bringing up the subject, a recycled link that is either amusing or frightening depending on how you look at it.
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Wow...eBay Find!

FRIEND FOR A MONTH!!! Buy me now!!

I knew that you can find just about anything on eBay, but this might be going too far. And if that one isn't, this one is! And another pathetic link, if you are in the market for an imaginary girlfriend.
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Robosapien Bling Bling

The Ultimate Robosapiens Review
I really must stop my obsession with this little thing. But until then, here's just about everything you might want to know about the Robosapiens robots. Perhaps the ultimate Robosapien review, loaded with tips, tricks, fembot supermodels, bling bling, smoking, drinking, and tons of resource links including how to program your Robosapien with a specialized Palm application called SAPBench and make him do the Macarena with supermodels! And, as a special bonus a Robosapiens music video!
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Mayor Visits Macy's

Welcome To The Big City
"Gina Valdez, wife of an Arkansas delegate, said she was awed. Valdez said she didn't think the mall is this big in Little Rock." DUH......Arkansas.....Hey, look at all the tall buildings.
"Macy's was offering a 15 percent discount to delegates." Wow, there's a shock...Macy's giving out coupons.
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Humor is just another defense against the universe.
Mel Brooks
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Republican Family Values

Hot Girls, Frisky Delegates: RNC Diary of a Strip-Club Waitress

Hey, at least they should tip well. Looks like a lot of raging hormones floating about NYC this week.
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Monday, August 30, 2004

Quiz Time

I thought this would be a walk in the park; but it's not. Strip away your preconceived notions, take this quiz and try to identify who is a Democrat and who is a Republican.
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When Nerds Protest!

As much as I loved the last sign, I found this one even more amusing. Originally posted on
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RNC in NYC update

I couldn't have said it better myself! Nice to see the large and well controlled turnout for the convention protests. More photoblog views here and also here.

Gentleman, start your engines; let the cliches begin. An interesting article from Slate about some of the rhetoric that we can look forward to.
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"Bush is not Hitler. He would be if he applied himself, but he's just lazy."
Margaret Cho
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Robot News!

Sharper Image offers exclusive the "Signature Series" Robosapien. The Sharper Image Robosapien Toy Robot is gleaming chrome or metallic blue, and sports a tattoo of his inventor's signature on its leg: Mark W. Tilden — the pioneering developer of applied biomorphic robotics. And Costco has the standard edition Robosapien for $69.00! Let the battle begin!

And if that isn't enough, you can order this really freakin' creepy $300 Sega robot cat called "Near Me", which sounds way too much like a threat if you ask me.

Leave it to the Japanese to be on the cutting edge of the robot field. This one is being used to patrol a shopping mall and it's parking lot!
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Sunday, August 29, 2004

Vets For W

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"Lately the only thing keeping me from being a serial killer is my distaste for manual labour."
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The Real Issue....

"You better watch out, you better not shout -- unless you’re a certified delegate inside Madison Square Garden. With protestors somewhere out of sight, the Republican National Convention will be a celebration of the ideology, values and interests served by this second Bush presidency."

A succinct listing of the core issues, or at least what "should be the core issues for the upcoming election. It's more likely that majority of the masses will be far more influenced over the fringe pseudo issues like the Swifties and The Right To Life nuts.

It's easy to obsess on politics right now, with the RNC coming to town, and the constant barrage of coverage. I find it amusing that all the delegates find the city "delightful"; OF COURSE...since most New Yorkers have left town, and with the blanket of security that has enveloped the city, Disneyland is probably a darker and more dangerous place!

I still am on the fence about if I should join the protest fun or not. If I go it will be a spur of the moment decision. I'd love to see the Shut It Down thing catch on, but as dramatic as it would be, probably not a realistic option for most involved in the service industries.
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Understanding the Uncivil War

Retro VS. Metro
The Great Divide explains why America is so bitterly divided and how it is really two countries whose people, with different economic interests, think and vote differently. It explains why Congress gave the lion’s share of anti-terrorism funds to small states with low probability of terrorist attack "while California, Florida, Illinois, New York, and Texas—with dense high-rise cities, mammoth seaports and airports, and nuclear generating plants—proportionally receive the least." It explains how to stop sending jobs overseas and why political power is in the hands of Republicans who pander to a predominantly white, fundamentalist Christian constituency while sending massive subsidies to campaign contributors—oil, gas, coal, logging, and farm corporations.

The Great Divide is a blueprint for how the Democratic Party can regain, and maintain, control of the White House, Senate, and House of Representatives. They recommend that the Democrats concede the Retro states and focus entirely on the Metro states, which should be their base. This would allow the party to develop a coherent message that would connect with voters and to take advantage of the fact that Metro states account for 65 percent of the population. Then, once a strong base is built, the Democrats can work on unifying America as a whole.
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Saturday, August 28, 2004


You've gotta love these motivational posters. Perhaps you're a wholly reasonable person, with the potential to become an irrational fool? Perhaps you're a team player, with a potentially argumentative loner lurking about inside you? Or perhaps you're a dreamer, within whom lives a potentially disillusioned grouse, simply waiting to take flight on the wings of bitterness? Whether you're a pessimist, underachievers or a chronic failure, guaranteed to inspire you to new lows!
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Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.
Albert Einstein
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"In 1969 Neal Armstrong became the first man to set foot on the moon.....or did he? For the first time ever we can now present the compelling evidence that the moon landing was a hoax. Take a look at the evidence which for over thirty years, NASA and the FBI have tried to supress...."

"If it was a real footprint, surely the Nike logo would be in reverse? And Apollo insiders swear that the crew were wearing Reebok Classics."
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Gotta Go BOGO!

Buy a car, get one free
Sounds too good to be true, but if you buy a new Nissan, the Route 46 Nissan dealership in Totowa is giving away a 2003 Nissan Sentra, usually an off-lease or traded-in vehicle. The only downside is that it's a used Sentra, but what do you want for free?

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Thursday, August 26, 2004

Put a Bush in your garden today

This is way too cool....I've got to get one of these: The Fine Ceramic George W. Bush Yard Gnome! Only slightly dumber than the real thing!
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The Great American Shout Out

The Great American Shout Out
On September 2nd, 2004, at approximately 10 pm, George W. Bush will appear on television screens nationwide....for most of us, it will be the low point of an incredibly exasperating week.

Until now, there have been only two options: miss the speech (either by screaming at the television or turning it off), or bottle up the frustration within us, causing irreparable psychological harm. The first option is unbecoming of citizens in a democracy. The second option is just terrible. But now, for the first time, we have a better way. At the moment we see the president on our television screens, we will rise. We will throw open our windows. And, as George W. Bush moves to the podium in New York City, we will send him a message about his bid for reelection: we will yell, “fuggedaboudit!” Or, you could plan to make it an event!
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Wednesday, August 25, 2004

What, Me Worry?

Help Show Bush "The Unemployment Line!"
Live in New York? Why not stand in line?

Help Show Bush "The Unemployment Line!"Send a loud and clear message to this administration and the country! Since George W. Bush took office, there are 1,200,000 fewer jobs for American workers - the greatest sustained job loss since the Great Depression! And yet the President still continues to campaign with the slogan that "we've turned a corner" in this economy. We, and the 8,200,000 currently unemployed Americans, disagree.

On September 1, the third day of the Republican National Convention, join us as we stand corner to corner -- from the corner of Broadway and Wall all the way up to the Republican National Convention at Madison Square Garden -- to form the World's Longest Unemployment Line.
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Tuesday, August 24, 2004

Hello Mutter....

Someone at work had told us about The Mutter Museum, which is a collection of old medical oddities. Since she has a colorful way to spin a story, I'm sure many of us probably thought this was an exaggeration, since most of her stories usually have us on the floor laughing or in tears. But The Mutter website gives all of us the opportunity for a virtual tour of their deformities, pathologies and medical anomalies, like the horned woman, the man with the giant colon, deformed fetuses, as well as a sliced up human head! Also available as a coffee table book!
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Pleasure Boat Captains for Truth

Pleasure Boat Captains for Truth Homepage
When George W. Bush talks about his past, he uses the words "reckless" and "irresponsible." He claims that in 1986, after half a lifetime of hard drink and easy women, he finally sobered up-- and he wants us to believe he'll never revert to his hard-partying ways.

But the captains who piloted his pleasure craft during those "wild" years, as well as his fellow pleasure craft revelers, see him in a very different light.
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Amazing Money Jar Bank

Looking at all the "crap" that we are carrying at work, makes me wish that we had the good sence to carry something as cool as this from The Discovery Channel Store. "This unique jar recognizes coins as they go in and keeps a running total of their value. A special LCD display in the lid tells you exactly how much you've saved."
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The Coincidence Theorist's Guide to 9/11

Rigorous Intuition: The Coincidence Theorist's Guide to 9/11
I've never been a big conspiracy theory person, but if you are a raging paranoid type this might appeal to you.
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Monday, August 23, 2004

The Metals of George W. Bush

Taking A Closer Look At The Metals of George W. Bush

Settling once & for all the controversy surrounding the medals of George W. Bush: Due to a large number of requests for information about his wartime heroism, I began studying his medals. What I found surprised me, and I felt it was my duty as an American to spread these remarkable findings.
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No Overtime For You!

New overtime rules are mostly bad news for employees
Another day, another dollar.....not so fast; maybe not. Today's new overtime rules c/o The Bush crew, explained. "Rule 6: Employees whose job requires imagination, invention, originality, or artistic or creative endeavors are not eligible for overtime"....and many more.
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No Soup For You!

Man Killed in Argument Over Soup
I like soup as much as the next guy, but this is a bit much.
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Sunday, August 22, 2004

It couldn't have been a more perfect day.....a sentiment that Chelsey shared as well. Started out with an ambitious agenda, only to realize that it was too beautiful outside to waste the day doing "stuff". Today was the kind of day that needed to be savored like a fine wine......letting it go down slowly so you can savor every drop. Hung out on the a book.....filled up the doggie pool, only to have her take one dive into it.......and then decide that she didn't want any part of it, and then she ran inside to curl up on the carpet. Smart doggie. More pics here.
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You Know You're From New Jersey When...

You Know You're From New Jersey When...
Normally, I hate stuff like this, but some are funny and many ring true:

You know that it's called "Great Adventure," not "Six Flags."
You've ordered a hard roll with butter for breakfast.
You remember that the "Two Guys" were from Harrison.
You know that the state isn't one big oil refinery.
You know what a "jug handle" is.
You know that a WaWa is a convenience store.
You know that "Acme" is an actual store, not just a Warner Bros creation.
You don't think "What exit" (do you live near?) is very funny.
You live within 20 minutes of at least three different malls.
You've gotten on the wrong highway trying to get out of Willowbrook Mall.
You know the location of every clip shown in the Sopranos opening credits.
You remember the stores Korvette's, Two Guys, Rickel's, Channel, Bamberger's and Orbach's.
You've never pumped your own gas.
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Saturday, August 21, 2004

Taking It Too Far

Top Ten Sandwich
Taking this top ten theme just one step too far, finds one bloggers' comments on Maxim's upcoming top ten sandwich list. A local creation "which is made with chicken fingers, mozzarella sticks and french fries, has been crowned the best sandwich"......"Are you f*#ing kidding me with this sandwich? Now I have been known to make some ridiculous sammiches but this thing is stupid. All this guy did is to take an appetizer sampler plate and stick it in a hoagie roll."
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A Theme Continues

Since I've gone down the "top 10" road I might as well continue. A repost of a David Letterman list....But cute nonetheless.
"10) The cucumber has left the salad...."

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The Top Ten Reasons Why John Kerry Sucks Less

Not really going for a top ten theme or anything....But I just fell into this one. Lukewarm support is still support I guess
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TOP 10 NJ GUV McGreevey jokes...

TOP 10 NJ GUV McGreevey jokes...
I must have been slow to catch this trend. NJ new state bird - The swallow....What does McGreevey and the Isreali Navy have in common? - jewish seaman.......We know he didn't like bush, but this is ridiculous.

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Friday, August 20, 2004

OnStar Service Conversations Not Selected for Commercials

The Morning News - Transcripts of OnStar Service Conversations Not Selected for Commercials
OnStar: Hello, OnStar.
Customer: My ice cream, it’s locked in the car, and it’s melting.
OnStar: Your ice cream is melting?
Customer: Yes, please hurry! It’s like 200 degrees in there!
OnStar: What kind of ice cream is it, ma’am?
Customer: Rocky road!
OnStar: I’m unlocking the vehicle now, ma’am.
Customer: Hurry! My three-year-old is in the car, too! I’m worried he’s going to eat the ice cream! I don’t want him to get fat! That would reflect poorly on my parenting skills!
And many other examples.....
|| JM, 8:01 AM || link || (0)||comments|| Email this link:

eBay item High School Yearbook NJ Gov.McGreevey

eBay item 3925836940 Ends Aug-22-04 - High School Yearbook NJ Gov. James McGreevey 1972 NR
I guess this was to be expected. What I didn't expect was that EBay had a catagory called "US Political & Gay Historical Memorabilia".
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Swift Boat Vets Claim Kerry is Cyborg from Future

Mad Guerilla Brigade - Swift Boat Vets Now Claiming Kerry is Communist Cyborg from the Future
Ah yes, the next logical step. "The President takes all communist cyborg from the future threats seriously," said Steve Schmidt, a Bush campaign spokesman. "Now does he believe the claims in the ads are true. No, but the President will never trample on the first amendment rights which endows every American with the freedom to speak his or her mind at will and without fear of repercussion… why do all of you press guys start laughing whenever I say that?"
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Thursday, August 19, 2004

The "NEW" George Foreman Grill

I'm sure that I found this funnier than I should have, but since we just got the "umteenth" version of the George Foreman Grill yesterday I found it amusing. Many more Photoshops of George at Fark.
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Saving the Vote

The New York Times Op-Ed Columnist:Saving the Vote
I always hate to give in to my "Chicken Little" instincts and subscribe to conspiracy theories, but more and more voices are more than a little concerned.

"Much of Florida's vote will be counted by electronic voting machines with no paper trails. Independent computer scientists who have examined some of these machines' programming code are appalled at the security flaws. So there will be reasonable doubts about whether Florida's votes were properly counted, and no paper ballots to recount. The public will have to take the result on faith.Yet the behavior of Gov. Jeb Bush's officials with regard to other election-related matters offers no justification for such faith......."
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Free Stuff!

Free Digital Prints
Dang....I'll have to rush over...this expires on the 22nd! But who can argue with the price?? Grab a memory card and fill it with your 25 favorite pics.....and Target will give you free prints!
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McDonald's Goes Deli

US News Article %7C
Yummy...MickeyD to add deli-style sandwiches to their menu. A good idea in theory....but in the past their attempts to move into a "quality" item haven't worked out too well. Even when they get it right...mediocre execution usually dooms it to failure. But just like slowing down to look at an don't want to but you do anyways....I keep going back. So here's hoping that they pull it off.
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25 Biggest Chokes - ESPN 25 - ESPN25%3A 25 Biggest Chokes
As if there were any doubt.....Bill Buckner ranked #1 on both polls!!
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Wednesday, August 18, 2004

Doing A Lindie

Bad Gas
"Who can forget the iconic image of Lynndie England, the ugly she-man, grinning and pointing at an Iraqi prisoner-of-war? The image has shocked, sickened and outraged people. But more importantly, it has captured the imagination of young men and women up and down the country who don't give much of a shit about anything. The result is a new craze called 'doing a Lynndie'."

Let's hope this trend doesn't catch on. It's almost funny until you remember how ugly and unfunny the original incident was. I always thought humor had no out of bounds subjects. So I was wrong. Plenty of pictures for the brave....or the stupid.
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Election Update

I'm glad to see that they have worked the kinks out of the Florida election process.
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Fifteen Things it took me Over 50 Years to Learn

I recently stumbled upon this gem from Dave Barry.
1. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
2. If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential, that word would be "meetings."
3. There is a very fine line between a hobby and mental illness.
4. People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them.
5. You should not confuse your career with your life.
6. Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.
7. Never lick a steak knife.
8. The most destructive force in the universe is gossip.
9. You will never find anybody who can give you a clear and compelling reason why we observe daylight savings time.
10. You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she's pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.
11. There comes a time when you should stop expecting other people to make a big deal about your birthday. That time is age eleven.
12. The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we ALL believe that we are above average drivers.
13. A person, who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person. (This is very important. Pay attention. It never fails.)
14. Your friends love you anyway.
15. Never be afraid to try something new. Remember that a lone amateur built the Ark. A large group of professionals built the Titanic.
|| JM, 7:24 AM || link || (0)||comments|| Email this link:

Tuesday, August 17, 2004

Nice Shirt

I guess that I'll have to order one of these so that I'll have something to wear to The Republican Convention. Check out the link for a humorous look at scheduled events.
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130,000 Free Condoms for The Olympians

130,000 Condoms for The Olympians
Good Lord! I hope that isn't a per person figure! We can only hope that they still have the strength to participate. Guess that there is alot of Olympic action that isn't getting network coverage.
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Why Does Disney Always Kill The Parents?

Why Does Disney Always Kill The Parents
Wow, I never really noticed that "Disney repeatedly puts out movies in which the parents are already dead, die a horrible death in the movie, or are just completely absent altogether." On the whole, there are probably lots of more important things to get worked up over, and certainly plenty of things that are worse for kids than Disney movies.
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Giant Robot Attacks Macy's

A giant Robosapien was recently spotted outside of Macy's Herald Square. No local sightings yet.
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The Ultimate Kitchen Appliance

I love gadgets, and I love neat kitchen products, but this one might be a bit much

"Brew coffee! Toast English muffins! Cook hardboiled eggs! Make a full breakfast with the 3 in 1 stainless steel Breakfast Machine.......tease your co-workers every morning as you make a delicious breakfast at your desk."

Oh yeah....I'm sure your co-workers would be green with envy.
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Monday, August 16, 2004

You Deserve A Break Today


Taking a break from picking on Wal-Mart, this link details some of the highlights of the companies history, lawsuits, protests, and senseless violence.

"1971 President of McDonald's Japan, Den Fujita, declares: "The reason Japanese people are so short and have yellow skins is because they have eaten nothing but fish and rice for two thousand years." Going further, he says: "If we eat McDonald's hamburgers and potatoes for a thousand years we will become taller, our skin become white, and our hair blonde."
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Unfortunate Piñata Fillings

McSweeney's Internet Tendency: Unfortunate Pi�ata Fillings.

Whiskers, 9-volt batteries, Armed Greeks, The unabridged OED, Bus schedules, Throwing stars, Newports (menthol), Refrigerator magnets in the shapes of states, Styrofoam peanuts, Tear gas, Flightless birds....
|| JM, 9:38 AM || link || (0)||comments|| Email this link:

Sunday, August 15, 2004

Looking Back

I continue to post links here that I stumble upon which I find amusing, as a sorta' on-line bookmark file. Since I just re-did the template, I decided to go back and see how the old posts looked with the new code. This caused me to review what I've posted so far and a few things surprised me. I really started this out to be more or a personal blog consisting of real and honest accounts of daily experiences/observations. I soon realized that I lacked the honesty, time, and guts to do that kind of thing too often. It soon turned into a series of annotated links. What really surprised me is the topics of the links that I've posted. Up to this point 40% are political, 34% relate to pop culture issues, 6% pertain to dogs, and 5% are about robots. So in an effort to bump up the robot percentages, here is an amusing, yet topical link (considering Governor McGreevey's recent troubles) guessed robots!
|| JM, 11:22 AM || link || (0)||comments|| Email this link:

Saturday, August 14, 2004

Please Go Away

"Two movies. I have two movies that are worth seeing."

A really funny site No more which has a ton of annoying celebrities,actors, and downright nobodies who have all outlasted there 15 minutes of fame.
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Village Idiot

Just in case you were still on the fence......Or the unlikely event that you forgot; here is a great site that lists over a thousand reasons to vote against GWB. Unfortunately, they are listed in alphabetical order, by category but it still makes for an interesting read.
|| JM, 9:50 AM || link || (0)||comments|| Email this link:

Thursday, August 12, 2004

Sucker Punch!

I didn't really expect him to play fair. This picture of George at play was in the Yale yearbook and was recently dug up by The Los Angeles Times. As this link from This Modern World puts it : "I'm sure by next week Karl Rove will have a collection of rugby players claiming that John Kerry was even worse..."

|| JM, 11:51 AM || link || (0)||comments|| Email this link:

Dogs Against Bush

"I hate George Bush more than the vacuum cleaner."

Gee, even the dogs are against Bush. A funny website with plenty of other dogs, all strangely articulate, all anti-Bush!

|| JM, 10:31 AM || link || (0)||comments|| Email this link:

Wednesday, August 11, 2004

Rap Lyrics Translated

Rap Lyrics Translated

First I talk about how I dress and this
And diamond necklaces - stretch Lexuses

I prefer to open the conversation with light banter about my wardrobe and jewelry, then I like to discuss my collection of expensive cars.

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Shop the Vote - Wal-Mart = Bush. Costco = Kerry. Costco's Winning.

Shop the Vote - Wal-Mart = Bush. Costco = Kerry. Costco's Winning. By Daniel�Gross

Interesting article; yet another opportunity to pick on Wal-Mart! "The company's labor policies are state-of-the-art, for the 1890s. Turnover at Wal-Mart is 44 percent, meaning it has to hire an astonishing 600,000 people every year simply to stay at its current size."

And another Slate article which continues the theme of "Two Americas Shopping."
|| JM, 11:16 AM || link || (0)||comments|| Email this link:

Monday, August 09, 2004

Get A Life

Gee...just when I think I have no life....I stumble upon sites like these.

Bring Back Kirk is one of those hard-core ST fan sites where "important issues" such as cannon and the vision of the franchise are discussed. ("The universe hangs in the balance. One man, thought to be dead, is the only one who can save it. The time has come to turn death into a fighting chance to LIVE! And a legend... will return!") One can't help remembering the old Shatner scetch from SNL...."Get A Life!"

And I can't decide if this one is amuzing...or even more disturbing than the other one. I'm leaning towards amuzing...but I could be wrong.

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Sunday, August 08, 2004

Let's Get Cooking!

I must run into two or three customers a week where I work who are looking for aprons. Of course, we don't carry them, but here is a great site that does! "Some are sultry, others silly, a few are even tasteful; but none of them are boring
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Saturday, August 07, 2004

This Seems Familiar

From today's Dilbert
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Unfair & Unbalanced

FOX's Your World sub host Varney obsessed with ... [Media Matters for America]
So much for "fair and balanced"......In an exchange with Disney president Robert Iger on the August 5 edition of FOX News Channel's Your World w/ Neil Cavuto, substitute host Stuart Varney managed to transform a conversation about Disney's new children's Dream Desk computer into a derisive attack on "Gay Days," an annual gathering at Disney World organized by private groups.

"You got any 'Gay Days' on the Mickey computer?" Varney asked Iger, adding, "You don't protect the kids from 'Gay Days' at the theme parks, do you?" Varney's criticism echoed attacks from right-wing groups on what they describe as Disney's "welcoming" of "Gay Days" participants, despite the fact that Disney plays no role in organizing or sponsoring the event.
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Terror Advisory Map

Today's terror alert from The National Lampoon

New York: 20% chance of landmark destruction today. Travelers over the Brooklyn Bridge are advised to check that their car-seat cushions can be used as flotation devices. A cloud of anxiety will continue to linger over the region for the foreseeable future.

Newark: Low. Interviews with Camp X-Ray detainees reveal that most Al Qaeda members believe that someone has already attacked Newark.

San Fransisco: Though threats to suspension bridges have proved to be unfounded, Bay-area residents are still advised not to bend over. 
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Friday, August 06, 2004

Bush, again, his own word enemy

New York Daily News - Politics - Bush, again, his own word enemy
"Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we," he said. "They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we."

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How They Could Steal the Election This Time

How They Could Steal the Election This Time
Bad code, lack of encryption, absence of security, missing memory cards, and the absence of a paper trail backup.......Nothing to worry about I'm sure! I'm not one to subscribe to conspiracy theories, but there seems to be plenty of reasons to question the integrity of some of these procedures. I don't see a lot here to instill confidence.

"People should go down to their local election departments and ask their supervisor of elections how they are going to know that their votes are counted--and refuse to take "Trust us," or "Trust the machines," for an answer."
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Anti-porn group slams Home Depot - Long Island News
I'm so glad that there is someone out there protecting my innocence. I haven't seen that many women at Home Depot that I'd want to see naked.....But we can always hope.

Please, write your own joke for this story. Keywords or phrases: getting wood, screws, laying pipe, nail, looking for caulk, rigid tools, or your own personal favorite.
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Wednesday, August 04, 2004

Build a better Bush

Build a better Bush
This November, Americans pick their President, but until then, lets pick on the President. Use the menues to change Mr. Bush's face.
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Monday, August 02, 2004

Dogs In Clothes

"You are ruining what self-esteem I have left"

And many more@ Radical Apathy Posted by Hello

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