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John's Blog

Give a man a fish and feed him for a day....Teach him to use the internet and he won't bother you for weeks!

Monday, July 23, 2007

Come Here Often?

I have a hard time imagining that anybody would actually use these, but at least this sampling of the Best (or worst) Pickup Lines (VIA Digg) may produce a chuckle. Although the Urban Dictionary appears to have correctly defined them as "Speech device primarily employed by two factions of mankind: the truly pathetic and amateur comedians. Origins have been disputed, but it is widely thought that pickup lines, once upon a magical time, could win p^$# if chanted with remarkable charisma and authenticity. Thanks to the combination of inevitability and human stupidity, pickup lines degraded into verses that invoke either uproarious laughter or further inalienation, but not the throes of sex." Don't say you haven't been warned.

  • Excuse me, but is that dress felt? Would you like it to be?
  • Hey baby, let's play house, you can be the door and I'll slam you!
  • I'm sorry, were you talking to me? (No.) Well then, please start.
  • Your name must be Mickey because your so fine.
  • Excuse me, do you have any raisins? How about a date?
  • You're ugly but you intrigue me.

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    || JM, 12:09 AM

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