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Tuesday, April 10, 2007

Core Values

A few of the Things Republicans Believe:

  • Being a drug addict is a moral failing and a crime, unless you're a conservative radio host. Then it's an illness and you need our prayers for your recovery.
  • Government should relax regulation of Big Business and Big Money but crack down on individuals who use marijuana to relieve the pain of illness.
  • A woman can't be trusted with decisions about her own body, but multi-national corporations can make decisions affecting all mankind without regulation.
  • Jesus loves you, and shares your hatred of homosexuals and Hillary Clinton.
  • The best way to improve military morale is to praise the troops in speeches while slashing veterans' benefits and combat pay.
  • Group sex and drug use are degenerate sins unless you someday run for governor of California as a Republican.
  • If condoms are kept out of schools, adolescents won't have sex.
  • A good way to fight terrorism is to belittle our long-time allies, then demand their cooperation and money.
  • HMOs and insurance companies have the interest of the public at heart.
  • Global warming and tobacco's link to cancer are junk science, but creationism should be taught in schools.
  • Saddam was a good guy when Reagan armed him, a bad guy when Bush's daddy made war on him, a good guy when Cheney did business with him and a bad guy when Bush needed a "we can't find Bin Laden" diversion.
  • A president lying about an extramarital affair is an impeachable offense. A president lying to enlist support for a war in which thousands die is solid defense policy.
  • Government should limit itself to the powers named in the Constitution, which include banning gay marriages and censoring the Internet.
  • The public has a right to know about Hillary's cattle trades, but George Bush's driving record is none of our business.
  • What Bill Clinton did in the 1960s is of vital national interest, but what Bush did in the '80s is irrelevant.
    Tags:
    • || JM, 10:21 AM

    2 Comments:

    Isn't that the truth? Thanks again, John.
    Blogger Peacechick Mary, at 7:18 PM  
    It's called hypocracy and don't we know it well from the Rebuplicans? I just watched "A Inconvienant Truth" last night and I was so glad that Al Gore acknoledges he was robbed in 2000. When is someone going to call for George Bush's impeachment?

    ~Liz
    Anonymous Anonymous, at 9:35 AM  

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