Alibi NetworkI would like to think this is a joke, but I suspect that it is a real business. If you need an excuse for missing work, skipping a friend's party, or looking to cover for spending time with a "special" friend, then this service may just be what you are looking for.
"We offer a service which can help protect your loved ones from undue anxiety, and help ensure the stability of long term relationships and financial security." sounds so polished and professional. Much less sleazy than "covering your sorry ass while you bang your secretary".