The Men Commandments
Violate the rules and you are out of the man club:No Man shall ever be required to buy a birthday present for another Man. In fact, even remembering your friend's birthday is strictly optional.
It is permissible to drink a fruity alcopop drink only when you're sunning on a tropical beach... and it's delivered by a topless supermodel...and it's free.
Only in situations of moral and/or physical peril are you allowed to kick another Man in the nuts.
If a Man's fly is down, that's his problem, you didn't see anything.
Never hesitate to reach for the last beer or the last slice of pizza, but not both - that's just mean.