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John's Blog

Give a man a fish and feed him for a day....Teach him to use the internet and he won't bother you for weeks!

Thursday, February 10, 2005

Good Advice



Laura Bush's Parents Guide To Raising Harlots
  • It is important that children learn to share at an early age. Start with a fifth of Cuervo Gold.
  • Tell the housekeeper to keep $1,000 (cash) in her purse at all times for bail. (This will save you from giving your girls your unlisted cell phone number.)
  • There is absolutely no excuse for a Christian young lady to be caught drinking liquor in public – especially when you consider that Seagram's 7 looks just like Original Listerine when it is decanted into a 16 oz. plastic mouthwash bottle!
  • Learn the difference between words "arrest" and "citation." This simple information can save you a world of embarrassment when friends or Jim Lehrer ask you: "So, which one of the twins was arrested last night?"
    • || JM, 9:06 AM

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